Dig deeper or jump off?

Just one more. Message. Email. {insert thing to do} ... exhausted, depleted... you've got this...just one more.

Dig deep.

Push through.

Kick it into overdrive.

That. ^ That's my wheelhouse.  All those years swimming. And now, parenting. I know how to push through.

When the treadmill picks up speed - I crank it up a notch.  Plow through.

I love a challenge. And. Underneath all of that - my actions are driven by fear.  What will *they* think if I don't do all.the.things.... (p.s. that's perfectionism).  The *shoulds* come rolling in...

I've released all of that - and set myself FREE. The thing is - it's not a one time decision.  Life gets busy - all.the.things. start coming at us... the treadmill picks up speed.

My reflex is to GO.  Except, now I can see it.  I can feel it in my body. Tense. Irritable. Pushing. Grinding.

I used to subscribe to the notion that stepping off the treadmill would be a fast track to nowhere.

That's a lie perfection tells us.

Here's what I know - when I'm in overdrive, I don't show up the way I want to - for myself, my girls, hubs, my friends, clients... my creativity halts. Nothing feels good.

There is a time and a place for plowing through - but, most of the time, at least for me, the magic happens in the slowing down and surrendering.

So, today - I stopped my workout 16 minutes in, threw my to-do list out and changed plans.  I caught myself and then moved toward the things that help me slow down and RECHARGE.

yoga + a walk in the sunshine + a spontaneous overnight trip with the fam.